When I leave this earth, what do I want people to remember about me? My answer to this question has changed over the past several months. I used to think I would want people to remember my achievements, and how hard of a worker I was. I know that's a super prideful answer, but I'm being honest. Society teaches us that our achievements get us places. Your degree will get you a higher paying job (which I've seen over the past few months is not always true). Your certificates will qualify you for different opportunities. The amount of "stuff" that you accumulate is a marker for how wealthy you are. The Lord has reminded me that my worth is not found in my stuff, and that the influence for Christ that I have on other people is what is important.
I have been blessed with some of the most consistent friends, ever. Some of them are pictured in this blog post. So many times in the past I have turned down a "hangout" due to things on my to do list. I have a to do list for every day of the week. It changes weekly, depending on what is going on that week. But I could have anywhere from 3 to 9 things on this list for each day. And until those things are completed, I feel internally stuck. However, because of the conviction that the Lord has placed upon my heart, I am working at changing this. Because, really, will my clean dishes be of more importance in eternity or will the conversation with my neighbors hold more value? If I don't have my school stuff prepared for NEXT tuesday (and it's only Wednesday), should I really turn down a lunch offer from one of my best friends? Here are some examples of how I have achieved this "switch" of priorities:
A few weeks ago, my husband held 2 fantasy football drafts in our apartment on consecutive nights. The drafts consisted of a wide range of AJ's friends, all of them boys. I could have gone in to the back and proceeded to grade my homework, alone. But instead, I plopped myself right in the middle of the room (on both nights) and graded in front of them as they participated in the draft. I was able to have conversations with them as I was grading, and had a good time.
Another example, a silly one, occurs every now and then at school. My dear friends Maria and Amanda always come by my office to see if I need to use the restroom. We like to go in groups. For the first few weeks of school, as I was getting everything together, I turned down a bunch of their requests. However, I have made an intentional decision to always join them, even when I don't have to go. I know you are laughing. But the conversations I have with them are more important than the coding of my lecture notes.
A few weeks ago, my husband held 2 fantasy football drafts in our apartment on consecutive nights. The drafts consisted of a wide range of AJ's friends, all of them boys. I could have gone in to the back and proceeded to grade my homework, alone. But instead, I plopped myself right in the middle of the room (on both nights) and graded in front of them as they participated in the draft. I was able to have conversations with them as I was grading, and had a good time.
Another example, a silly one, occurs every now and then at school. My dear friends Maria and Amanda always come by my office to see if I need to use the restroom. We like to go in groups. For the first few weeks of school, as I was getting everything together, I turned down a bunch of their requests. However, I have made an intentional decision to always join them, even when I don't have to go. I know you are laughing. But the conversations I have with them are more important than the coding of my lecture notes.
This whole "life lesson" really hit home last week. Last week, news came to me that the boyfriend of a good friend of mine, unexpectedly passed away. I cried on my way home. I was physically hurting for my friend because of the unexpected death of her loved one. It made it worse for me that it was "unexpected". I know this always happens, but this death reminded me that life is not guaranteed to anyone. We can take all of the precautions we think we need, such as eating healthy, exercising, building muscle, gaining strength, etc. None of these can prevent accidents from occurring, or more importantly, God's timing. Since I heard of this occurrence I have tried my hardest to remind my friends of what they mean to me. I have stopped to have conversations with the neighbors that live downstairs, I have opened my home for the youth to come over and watch a football game with AJ, I have accepted offers to go on a lunch date with a dear friend, all because I want people not to remember me because I was a "hardworker", but instead, because I took every opportunity to spend time with them that I could. It's scary to think that none of us are guaranteed another minute. However, it should create in us an urgency to be as kind, and loving, as possible to the people we come into contact with.